Monthly Archives: January 2015

My Picks For My Favorite Super Bowl Prop Bets

Welcome to the 94th edition of Tuesdays With Mitch, where all balls are always properly inflated. (Boom! Got the mandatory ball joke out of the way right off the bat.) Let’s get into it…

I think those are shorts. The odds of Katy Perry wearing shorts when she performs at halftime of the Super Bowl are 2/1. And hey, when you get an opportunity to use a picture of Katy Perry as your header image, you take it. (Joe Raedle Getty Image)

If you haven’t heard, the Super Bowl is this Sunday and not many folks ’round these parts are very excited for it. Both teams are full of douche bags; both fan bases are insufferable. Also, each team is way better than the Broncos, so that doesn’t help either. But I come with good news! There IS one thing we can all rally around and enjoy on Super Bowl Sunday without concerning ourselves with the stupid outcome of the stupid game. Gambling! And not just the normal, run of the mill, point spread stuff. I’m talking really weird, random prop bets. Bets about Katy Perry’s clothes and the National Anthem being screwed up.

Now, I was in Vegas a few weeks ago betting on about 20 different college bowl games over the course of three days and if that performance is any indication… I’M TOTALLY DUE FOR A BIG WEEKEND. (I also vowed to never again bet on another sporting event, but let’s ignore that for the sake of today’s post.)

Anyway, Fox Sports put together a list of some of the more interesting prop bets listed at Bovada and here are a few that you should throw some money on:

  • How long will it take Idina Menzel to sing the US National Anthem?
  • Over/Under: 2 Minutes, 1 Second

This one might seem completely random and unpredictable. It’s not. I’m here to help. Here’s Menzel (or Adele Dazeeb) singing the anthem at July’s MLB All Star Game:

I clock her at 1:59.27 in this version. So yeah, it’ll be close. Will she draw it out a little more on a much bigger stage? Will she be a little nervous and rushed with more than 100 million people watching? Who knows.

What we can count on is some actual research. In the above video, there is a noticeable pause– almost five seconds long!– after she sings FREEEEEEE while she waits for the flyover jets to pass and gathers herself for the big finish. There will be another flyover at the Super Bowl, but it seems too unlikely to count on another pause of that length. That’s the key!

There’s also this performance from 2008— before a Patriots game even!– in which I clocked her waaaayyy under at 1:34.99. Obviously the more recent performance is worth more of our attention, but this tidbit only reinforces where to put your money on this one.

THE PICK: UNDER 2:01

  •   Will Idina Menzel forget or omit at least one word of the national anthem?    
  • Yes: +500
  • No: -800

Free money. No way in hell she forgets the words. She’s a pro. She’s not Christina Aguilera. Bet eight bucks. Win a dollar. Free freaking money. You’re welcome.

THE PICK: NO: -800

  • Which song will Katy Perry perform first at halftime?
  • Firework: 3/2
  • Roar: 3/2
  • This Is How We Do: 5/1
  • Dark Horse: 12/1
  • E.T.: 12/1
  • Wide Awake: 12/1
  • Waking Up In Vegas: 20/1

I think I’ve heard of two of these songs. I’m no help here. Sorry. But hey I would doubt she sings about Vegas in a game in Glendale between teams from Boston and Seattle. Just a thought.

  • What will Katy Perry be wearing when she begins the Halftime show? 
  • Pants (below knees):  5/2
  • Shorts (above knees):  2/1
  • Skirt or dress: 4/5

Now, I might not know any of her music, but I’ve definitely paid attention to Katy Perry’s wardrobe over the years. Beyond that, I happily did some research on this one. A quick YouTube search of “Katy Perry Live” yields a lot of performances with Perry in some brightly colored weird-ass costume-type things that I guess would have to be considered a skirt or dress. No pants. I think I saw one pair of short shorts. Originally, my gut said the value play here was to gamble a bit and go with shorts. After all, Katy Perry can look awfully enticing in a pair of tight and short shorts. Upon further review, she’s too damn weird to even consider wearing something as normal as shorts on a stage of this magnitude. The payout is lower but take the free money.

THE PICK: SKIRT OR DRESS: 4/5

  • How many times will “Deflated” Balls be said during the game? (From kickoff until final whistle. Live pictures only, any taped pictures or past video does not count towards wager. Halftime does not count towards wager. Must clearly say “Deflated” or “Deflate”. Book Manager’s decision is final. NO OVERLIMITS)
  • Over/Under:  3

This one opened at 2 1/2 but has moved a very crucial half-mention (?) to 3. I’d like to get a solid, 100 percent ruling on the term “DeflateGate”, but from what I can see in that disclaimer any form of “deflate” counts. So in that case OVER OVER OVER OVER OH MY GOOD LORD OVER OVER OVER HAVE YOU PEOPLE BEEN NEAR A TV OR COMPUTER OR NEWSPAPER ANY TIME IN THE PAST TWO WEEKS THIS IS SO DAMN EASY THEY’LL SAY DEFLATE TEN TIMES IN THE FIRST FREAKING QUARTER. DEFLATEGATE IS ALL THERE IS IN THIS WORLD AND ALL THERE EVER WILL BE. ALL HAIL DEFLATEGATE.

THE PICK: OVER 3

  • Bill Belichick Hoodie Type? 
  • Sleeves Cut: -150
  • Sleeves Intact: +110

More free money! Why in the world would Belichick wear sleeves in this game? After two weeks of addressing that stuff about deflated footballs (have you heard about that?) he’s going to act as Belichick-ian as possible just to troll the masses. Also, the weather is usually pretty nice in Arizona. There will be no sleeves.

THE PICK: Sleeves Cut: -150

  • Which color will Bill Belichick’s hoodie be?     
  • Grey: 1/2
  • Blue: 7/4
  • Red: 7/1

Time for more next-level research!

Here’s BB in SB XXXVI in 2002. BLUE! (Also, not a hoodie)

Getty Images

And in SB XXXVIII in 2004, BLUE again! (Also not a hoodie again.)

AP Photo

In SB XXXIX in 2005 the hoodie made its first appearance. It was GRAY.

(Al Messerschmidt/Getty Images)

In SB XLII in 2008 a RED hoodie made its only appearance. This was BB’s first Super Bowl loss as Patriots’ head coach.

(AP Photo/Stephan Savoia)

In SB XLVI in 2012 he went back to GRAY in another loss to the Giants.

AP Photo

This season in the playoffs he’s gone BLUE against the Ravens…

Getty Images

…And BLUE against the Colts.

AP Photo

There is really no sense in picking Gray at -200. Blue’s odds at -175 aren’t much better. Red seems unlikely because it such a historically rare choice. I think Belichick will probably end up wearing a blue hoodie. But sometimes you gotta gamble a bit and that big number next to Red is really attractive.

THE PICK: Red 7/1

  • What will be higher?        
  • Russell Wilson Pass Yards: -15 1/2
  • US National Average Gas Price (in cents) on Monday, Feb. 2: +15 1/2

This has got to be the strangest damn prop bet I have ever seen. Can you imagine betting like $100,000 on whether the average national gas price will be within 15 1/2 cents of the total number of yards a quarterback throws for in a football game?! How do people even come up with this stuff? God Bless America. The gas price source Bovada is using is here. At the time of this posting it’s $2.038.

I’ll go with the gas and the 15 1/2 yards/cents because a couple days ago I think some guy on the news said the price might go up soon (I refuse to do actual research on this) and I don’t think Russell Wilson is going to have a very good game.

THE PICK: US National Average Gas Price (in cents) on Monday, Feb. 2: +15 1/2

Okay let’s transition to a couple of the props regarding the actual football game, even though they’re not as fun.

  • Margin of Victory           
  • New England Patriots 1 to 6 points: 7/2      
  • New England Patriots 7 to 12 points: 11/2    
  • New England Patriots 13 to 18 points: 8/1      
  • New England Patriots 19 to 24 points: 14/1    
  • New England Patriots 25 to 30 points: 20/1   
  • New England Patriots 31 to 36 points: 35/1    
  • New England Patriots 37 or more points: 30/1    
  • Seattle Seahawks 1 to 6 points: 7/2 
  • Seattle Seahawks 7 to 12 points: 11/2   
  • Seattle Seahawks 13 to 18 points: 8/1  
  • Seattle Seahawks 19 to 24 points: 14/1    
  • Seattle Seahawks 25 to 30 points: 20/1 
  • Seattle Seahawks 31 to 36 points: 35/1    
  • Seattle Seahawks 37 or more points: 30/1    

I think the Patriots have a pretty good shot to win this game comfortably. The best combo of realistic margin of victory and appealing odds is New England by a couple touchdowns and the opportunity to turn 100 bucks into 900.

THE PICK: New England Patriots 13 to 18 points: 8/1      

  • Who will have more Passing Yards in the game?
  • Tom Brady: -39 1/2
  • Russell Wilson: +39 1/2

Will Brady throw for 40 more yards than Russell Wilson? Hell yes he will.

THE PICK: Tom Brady -39 1/2

  • Will there be a safety in the game?        
  • Yes: +550
  • No: -900

Safeties happen. I even saw one in a Super Bowl once! Pretty solid odds. Why not?

THE PICK: Yes: +550

  • Will a 2-point conversion be attempted in the game?   
  • Yes: +200
  • No: -250

2/1 odds for either team even attempting to go for two at any point in the game? Too good to pass up.

THE PICK: Yes: +200

  • Shortest successful field goal in the game
  • Over/Under: 24 1/2

After Mike McCarthy made an idiot out of himself by kicking it from the 1-yard line twice in the NFC Championship game, I think each Super Bowl coach will be more bold. No kicks from inside the 7.

THE PICK: Over: 24 1/2

That’s enough of that. And please keep in mind that since I am the one making these picks, they are all very likely to be 100 percent incorrect.

Let’s move on to the weekly departments…

Douches of the week:

The Cincinnati Bengals are not granting permission for the Denver Broncos to formally interview Vance Joseph for their vacant defensive coordinator position. The Broncos have made it clear that Joseph is on the top of their list. Joseph has paid his dues as a defensive backs coach and has a great opportunity to continue to climb the ranks of the NFL coaching ladder, but his current employers are forcing him to stay where he’s at. That’s douchey!

I’m a little bias here because I would much rather the Broncos hire an up-and-comer like Joseph than a crusty old retread like Wade Phillips or Mike Smith.

Still though, what stupid way for the Bengals to run their organization.

Stud of the week:

Mike Krzyzewski (totally spelled that without looking it up) won his 1,000th game on Sunday, which is just an amazing number. I think Coach K has to be considered the greatest college basketball coach of all-time, just ahead of John Wooden because Shashefsky has done his incredible work in a much different and more difficult era.

A lot of people hate Duke, but I’ve always found Coach K to be classy and gracious, going about his business without much controversy.

You should also read this long profile from ESPN the Magazine.

Vines of the week:

Blake Griffin is freaking hilarious:

The Ohio University Bobcats beat Buffalo on a pretty incredible walk-off, buzzer beating dunk. Props to the school’s official Vine account for nailing those six seconds, too.

I can’t even comprehend what is happening here but I’m pretty sure it’s awesome.

Some other stuff from around the internet:

A new “Bad British Commentary” dropped today. TICKLE ME ALL THE WAY TO THE BANK! I just love these damn videos.

New Mexico guard Hugh Greenwood has a mom battling cancer and Greenwood is active on Twitter. Knowing the trolls that lurk on Twitter, that might not necessarily be the best combo. Greenwood, though, found some motivation from some disgusting anonymous Tweets. This is great.

Ball kids in tennis are really weird. This dude just stands there and let’s a serve hit him right in the… balls. And we all know people getting hit in the balls is always hilarious! At least he protected the sanctity of the sport or whatever.

Here’s the GIF:

And finally,  just in case you’ve been stuck under a rock the past few days, here is the latest NFL version of Bad Lip Reading. Still awesome.

Dez really likes his Funyons.

Happy Tuesday everybody. Thanks for reading. See ya next week.

***

Comment on any of this stuff below, or email me at mdhahn1@yahoo.com with post ideas, videos or other media I should know about. Subscribe at the top right of this page. Follow me on Twitter @TuesWithMitch.

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Your Weekly Roundup From the Sports World and Internet

Welcome to the 93rd edition of Tuesdays With Mitch, where I have a really hot take regarding the Super Bowl matchup:  I DON’T LIKE EITHER OF THESE TEAMS!!! THIS WILL BE THE WORST SUPER BOWL EVER!! Let’s get into it…

The new head coach of the Denver Broncos, seen here mean-mugging the world.. (Lloyd Fox, Baltimore Sun)

I’ll start with some quick thoughts on the Broncos’ hiring of Gary Kubiak as their head coach.

As we all know, there has never been a coaching hire that led the people in charge to do anything but shout from the rooftops about how wonderful and life-changing the news is. Every coaching hire is met with some degree of optimism and most are met with lots and lots and lots of optimism. (Recruiting classes in college are the same way.)

So with that in mind, I’m taking a very original approach to the Kubiak hire and saying I LIKE IT!

John Elway has proved to have a Not-Effing-Around mindset when it comes to winning a Super Bowl and Kubiak was undoubtedly his first choice to replace John Fox, who coached in the playoffs like he was thinking about the real estate market in Chicago more than the Colts’ defense.

Kubiak is a well-respected NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE lifer that generally gets the most out of his players, who all speak highly of him. He and Elway are BFFs who share similar mindsets when it comes to football and, presumably, lots of non-football stuff too. Kubiak will be more innovative and creative and hopefully less conservative than his predecessor.

The biggest initial question is how Kubiak’s under center, run first, bootleg, play-action offense will mesh with Manning’s style of offense, which is basically the opposite of all that. Indeed, this will be interesting to watch next fall, but it’s not something I’m overly concerned with. First, we don’t even know if Manning will be the Broncos’ quarterback next year (I’m still betting he will). Second, these guys should be able to adapt and find some sort of offense that suits them both. These are two of the best offensive minds in football. Just because they have traditionally different philosophies shouldn’t mean they can’t work together. And most importantly, you can’t make a coaching decision based on the needs of one player, particularly when that player is coming off an injury and is about to turn 39.

The Kubiak hire appears to set us up for Broncos A.M. (After Manning), which is an era that is coming at us quicker than most anticipated a few months ago.

So this move ought to be one that sets the Broncos up for success in the long-term. (Aren’t they all?) The short-term– meaning next season– is far more dependant on the health and skill set of the quarterback than the guy wearing the headset on the sideline.

Overall though, the Broncos introduced their new coach today. It’s a good hire. And even if it’s not, we might as well be optimistic. That’s what coaching hires are for. YAYYYY WE’RE ALL IN SUCH GOOD HANDS WHAT’S NOT TO LIKE?! (I actually do feel that way.)

And hey that NFC Championship game was pretty interesting.

The sequence of events in the fourth quarter was just absurdly unlikely. It’s worth it to put aside your hate of the Seahawks for a minute just to appreciate how absolutely bonkers that game was.

An all-time collapse from the Packers. And credit to the Seahawks who didn’t quit when a lot of teams would have.

Here’s the beautiful fake field goal that got things started for the Seahawks. (Although, not really. They were still dead in the water after this.)

And here’s the onside kick that played a pretty major role in the Packers’ faceplant. Look at Jordy Nelson just hanging out waiting to catch that ball.

Amazing game.

This brings us to our…

Douches of the week:

Seahawks fans! (Again.)

I had a mini-rant about the Seahawks’ fans prior to their hosting the Broncos in the season’s third week. This week we get to laugh at all the 12th Bags who left the NFC Championship early, only try to run back into the stadium, only to be denied re-entry, only to try watch the game on the concourse TVs from outside the stadium.

Now, wait a minute… I thought Seattle had the best fans in football. The best home field advantage in football. The only fans in the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE that can have a real impact on the game.

These folks left the NFC Championship game, probably after Russell Wilson’s fourth interception with about five minutes to go and the Seahawks down by 12.

That’s pretty much unacceptable. If it was any other game I wouldn’t have a huge problem with it. I hate traffic more than most and am more realistic about my team’s chances of victory than most. The conference championship, however, is literally the biggest game a football team can host in their own stadium. You leave that game with five minutes left when you’re down twelve points? DOUCHES!

And yes, it’s worth mentioning that the vast majority of fans stayed until the end. (Duh. No credit for that.) And yes, it’s worth mentioning that every team in the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE would have a few fans leave early in the given scenario. But this is simply more proof that Seahawks fans are just like every other fan base in the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE. Why can’t we all just admit that?

There’s also this guy celebrating on the field after the game by pulling his pants down and drinking out of a pink plastic water bottle. I have no explanation for this.

SEATTLE, WA - JANUARY 18:  A Seattle Seahawks fan celebrates after the Seahawks defeated the Green Bay Packers  in the 2015 NFC Championship game at CenturyLink Field on January 18, 2015 in Seattle, Washington.  (Photo by Tom Pennington/Getty Images)

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (Tom Pennington-Getty Images)

Studs of the week:

We’re taking a sharp right turn away from the football world because we need to talk about what Colorado State did to Nevada on the basketball court Wednesday night. Nevada isn’t good, but isn’t an awful team either. Prior to playing CSU they beat a decent UNLV team on the road. The Rams beat the Wolfpack 98-42. NINETY-EIGHT TO FORTY-TWO. Obviously a beatdown like that will produce some crazy team statistics, but I just want to focus on some of the hilarious scores from this game.

The Rams started the game by jumping out to a 25-3 lead. They led 45-10 with three minutes left in the first half and 55-12 at half time. The trend continued in the second half. With 11 minutes left the Rams led 75-22. With 8 minutes left…

The Rams’ big lead of the game came just before the final, when they led by 58 points, 98-40.

Then on Saturday, CSU beat San Jose State by 29 points. San Jose State is absolutely awful by every metric, so this wasn’t much of an accomplishment. Still, raise your hand if you can remember the last time the Rams won two consecutive games by a total of 85 points.

The Rams are now 17-2 (!) and have an RPI of 36. If they continue to play well throughout their conference schedule, they should be the only team in Colorado headed to the NCAA tournament.

Big one at Moby on Saturday against San Diego State. 8 p.m. White out. See y’all there.

Vine of the week:

Looks like we’re keeping it in the Mountain West. Larry Nance Jr. keeps doing cool things for Wyoming.

Photo of the Week:

I spent about ten seconds taking this picture on my phone while I was walking into work on Friday morning, so I’m not patting myself on the back too much, but just look at that sunrise!

A couple (or single) link(s) worth sharing:

Just one story you need to get into this week. Kurt Busch testified under oath that his ex-girlfriend is a trained assassin. Even though it likely contains ridiculous amounts of lying under oath, this is the most amazing story, like, ever.

And finally, I saw “American Sniper” and “Boyhood” this weekend. They’re both excellent. Bradley Cooper will probably win Best Actor at the Oscars. But Boyhood will definitely win Best Picture. You need to carve out three hours and watch this movie. It’s unlike any movie that’s ever been made.

(I clearly didn’t have any funny sports videos for this spot this week.)

Happy Tuesday everybody. Thanks for reading. See ya next week.

***

Comment on any of this stuff below, or email me at mdhahn1@yahoo.com with post ideas, videos or other media I should know about. Subscribe at the top right of this page. Follow me on Twitter @TuesWithMitch.

The Broncos Flop and John Fox Is Gone

Welcome to the 92nd edition of Tuesdays With Mitch, where the holidays are over, the Broncos’ season is over, the college football season is over, the weather is crappy, and March Madness is more than two months away. What a depressing intro! Let’s get into it…

It’s been real, Foxy. (Ron Chenoy, USA Today Sports)

John Fox’s last game with the Denver Broncos was a disaster. Playing at home against an inferior Colts team, the heavily favored Broncos were dismantled and lost convincingly, 24-13. They were lucky it was that close.

In the 2013 season, the Broncos appeared to be the best team in the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE. They made it to the Super Bowl fairly easily. Their performance in the Super Bowl was a disaster. They were outplayed, outcoached, and completely unprepared for sport’s biggest stage. They were blown out by the Seahawks 43-8.

In the 2012 season, the Broncos rolled into the playoffs as the AFC’s highest seed, again earning a first-round bye. They were heavy favorites at home. Again, they didn’t play well against an inferior team and saw yet another disastrous ending, blowing a late lead and losing to the Ravens in stunning, gut-wrenching double overtime.

For plenty of franchises in the sports world, the scenarios mentioned above would represent successful seasons. The Denver Broncos are not one of them. Not with John Elway running things.

We can talk all we want about Elway’s issues with the team’s preparation and mental toughness or the differing opinions on the changing offensive schemes, but the outcomes of those three games are the reason John Fox and John Elway told each other to get lost on Monday afternoon.

It had to be done.

John Fox coached the Broncos for four years, compiling a 46-18 regular season record. He went 38-10 post-Tebow. But those gaudy numbers will always ring hollow because of the way the team performed in the playoffs, where two home field faceplants sandwich an embarrassing Super Bowl appearance.

Let’s talk a little more about the most recent faceplant.

The Broncos started the game by forcing a three-and-out. Then they marched the down the field for a touchdown and a 7-0 lead. It was all downhill from there. The Broncos did not find the end zone again. The Broncos’ next seven drives– against a very mediocre defense– ended like this:  Punt, Fumble, Punt, Punt, Field Goal, Punt, Punt. Remember that high-powered, intimidating, record-breaking offense with an unstopabble array of weapons? Me neither.

The Broncos’ offensive game plan on Sunday appeared to be:   ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

When that idea failed, they simply had their quarterback, who couldn’t really throw, repeatedly chuck the ball down the field, hopefully in the general vicinity of a receiver. It worked zero times.

By the end of the afternoon, the Broncos looked tired. They looked unenthused. They looked anxious to call it a year and go home.

This game felt like the end of an era. On Monday, we learned it was, indeed, the end of the John Fox era. But there is a greater feeling of finality and change beyond the coaching staff not returning. This game felt like the last time the Broncos can be looked at as perennial Super Bowl contenders. Over the past three years, we’ve grown accustomed to the Broncos being one of a handful of favorites to win the Super Bowl. Before the season, we could look at the schedule and easily pick out twelve or thirteen games the Broncos should win. Those days are over. At least, they certainly appear to be.

Of course, much of the reason for this outlook is due to the play of Peyton Manning on Sunday and in the regular season’s last few weeks. He just wasn’t the same guy. Never was this more apparent than on Sunday when the Broncos’ offense repeatedly stalled after several poor throws from Manning.

Then Monday also brought the reports that Manning was playing on a torn/strained/tweaked/hurt/injured right quad. Is that why Manning didn’t play that well? Or is that just a convenient excuse? Did we all just witness the end of Manning’s incredible career?

These are all questions Elway and Manning will need to try to figure out, preferably sooner than later.

So aside from needing a new coaching staff, the Broncos don’t really know what they have coming back at quarterback. Even when Manning decides to make it official and play another season (I think he will), the Broncos still won’t know exactly what they have at quarterback for the next year or two. That’s not an ideal situation to be in.

In the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE, a handful of teams feel really good about their quarterback, a handful of teams have a “pretty good” quarterback, and a bunch of teams have a crap quarterback. The past few years, the Broncos have been among the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE’s best teams because they’ve had a great quarterback. If Manning has devolved into a “pretty good” quarterback (or worse) the Broncos, as a team will also inevitably fall back to the pack, a place they haven’t been since the Tebow days of 2011.

John Elway has “won free agency” a few years in a row. And for the third year in a row, Elway, Fox, and Manning have failed to win on the field in the playoffs. Another year has come and gone and with it, another opportunity to win the Super Bowl.

I’m afraid that might have been the last one for a while.

Not a good way to end things, Peyt.  (@NickiJhabvala, Denver Post)

Off to the weekly departments…

Tweets of the week:

Ummm…

Roy Halladay’s picture is pretty hilarious:

Vines of the week:

Colorado State and Air Force threw down. It started with this headlock and girly punch to the back:

(Here’s the full video.)

Look at the Hawks’ bench celebrating before Korver even shoots it:

And I just keep laughing at Puddles’ dramatic entrance last night:

Photo of the Week:

Beautiful, unique picture from last night’s national championship.

(Simon Bruty, Sports Illustrated)

A couple links worth sharing (lots this week!):

Some other stuff the internet had to offer this week:

Just a nice, relaxing drive on the city bus.

I always knew public transportation wasn’t for me.

Kenny Mayne‘s tribute to Stuart Scott was touching:

And finally, the college football version of Jimmy Kimmell’s “Mean Tweets” segment is absolutely awesome.

Happy Tuesday everybody. Thanks for reading. See ya next week.

***

Comment on any of this stuff below, or email me at mdhahn1@yahoo.com with post ideas, videos or other media I should know about. Subscribe at the top right of this page. Follow me on Twitter @TuesWithMitch.

2014 Year In Review, Part Two

Welcome to– and another Happy New Year from– the 91st edition of Tuesdays With Mitch, where I’m blogging for the first time in 2015. Let’s get into it…

It’s 2015 now, but I’m not ready to look ahead at the coming year or look back on the five days that have already passed. 2014 has come and gone and in doing so provided 52 weeks– and 52 posts– of sports and pop culture content. It’s time to reminisce on all that we took in last year so I went back and reviewed each of the last 52 posts and pulled out all of my favorite things.

So let’s look back at the year that was. Sports highlights, sports lowlights, news bloopers, funny videos, moving pictures… Here are some of my favorites. The best, the worst, the most memorable. We’re talking Vines, GIFs, videos, posts, pictures, tweets, moments and other stuff from 2014. (This post got so big, I split it up into two sections. Part One was posted last week.)

I present: Your Tuesdays With Mitch 2014 Year in Review (Part Two):

We pick this thing up in…

JULY:

The dog days of summer produced a lot of baseball and soccer talk across the country. And the early part of the month produced another all-time great Vine.

This one became so popular so fast, lots of people thought it was fake, causing the MLB to step in and confirm its validity. It was quite the controversy.

The World Cup finally came to end in mid-July when some country beat some other country. I couldn’t take it anymore and had to provide my thoughts on soccer, which evidently pissed some people off.

On an international scale, we suck at soccer. We always have and we always will. We suck because we don’t really give a damn. We never have and we never will.

People were excited about the World Cup not because they have a newfound love for soccer, but because of national pride (I am an advocate of U-S-A chants, after all), an excuse to weekday day drink, and the biggest factor, social media group think.

Social media was flooded with athletes and celebrities voicing their support on the job done by the #USMNT. For what? The team’s 1-2-1 performance? Or was it to help build their own brand, get a few ReTweets and Facebook likes and show that they’re in touch with pop culture and supportive of whatever you support?

This obviously goes far beyond famous athletes and other celebs. It became “the thing to do” for everybody. Countless Americans didn’t want to feel left out, so they posted a bunch of tweets, statuses, pictures and stupid memes about the #USMNT even though they literally couldn’t name one player on any team the day before the World Cup started.

Is soccer on the rise in the United States? I guess. Maybe. But if it is, it’s increasing from a tiny minority to a small minority. So congrats on that, soccer.

I regret nothing.

But hey, this Vine of goalie or keeper or whatever Tim Howard not giving out hugs is still stellar.

Even though the Rockies were really bad, watching their infield turn double plays was a treat all year. This was probably the best one, which I referred to at the time as “majestic artistry.”

By mid-July the wheels were completely falling off for the Rockies and owner Dick Monfort wasn’t handling things well. This led to what was probably the funniest thing I wrote all year, “In Defense of Dick Monfort.” That post received quite a bit of positive feedback, so thanks. Go read it again, you lazy bum.

The ESPY’S came and went at the end of the month. Stuart Scott’s speech was just the best.

(Note: I had most of this post completed prior to Scott’s passing on Sunday, so this video was already embedded. This speech is certainly more difficult to watch today than it was just a few days ago. But it’s also more moving and important to watch. He nailed it, man. I also encourage you to watch ESPN’s beautiful tribute and Rich Eisen’s perfect, live remembrance from Sunday.)

AUGUST:

Sad news came in the beginning of August when Pat Bowlen stepped down as owner of the Broncos to focus on his battle against Alzheimer’s. So, so damn sad.

I don’t read much Woody Paige anymore, but his column on Bowlen was a must-read.

August brought us the first sniffs of the college football season, starting most importantly, with THE RUNNING OF THE GUMPS. I enjoyed breaking down the Alabama hillbillies racing to worship Nick Saban. (Seriously I just cracked up over looking at the pictures/captions of those freaks one more time.)

And a trio of amazing news stories all came out around the same time, starting with my favorite news blooper of the year.

Followed by the best overall news story of the year, without a doubt.

Although this dude was not to be outdone.

The firing of Jack Graham came in early August and began a CSU-intensive few months for this blog. I kind of still can’t believe it happened. At the time, it seemed like this meant the on-campus stadium project had officially fallen through.

August 17th brought Todd Helton’s number retirement ceremony. It was perfect.

(Aaron Ontiveroz/Denver Post)

The Little League World Series came along and was as entertaining as always. We can’t forget this great speech from a coach who managed to keep everything in perspective.

A lot of you enjoyed my “Colorado State Football and Rocky Mountain Showdown Preview“. I spend a good amount of time just trash-talking CU, including discussing these numbers, which have only gotten dramatically worse after CU went winless in the Pac-12 in 2014.

Obviously, part of the reason for Colorado’s awful records and innumerable blowout losses is because they usually play a really tough schedule. This is all funny to me because one of the bragging points among Colorado fans is their conference. They’re in the Pac-12! That’s one of the best conferences in the nation! It’s prestigious! They play really good teams like Stanford and USC and Oregon! Good for them!

One interesting sidenote many CU fans seem to forget: Colorado is 4-23 against the Pac-12 in their three years in the conference. Wait guys, 4-23? That’s really bad. That’s a .148 winning percentage. But hey it’s a really prestigious conference! Who cares if they get blown out and embarrassed by all the good teams every week?

The pre-showdown CU hate is one of my favorite traditions every year!

SEPTEMBER:

September began with a recap of CSU’s fun victory over CU. The CSU student section was named Stud of the Week for their remarkable performance.

@NolanLees

Naturally, as the season wore on and CU was revealed to be a really bad team again, the win looked less and less important to Rams fans. Still fun though.

The first true “football weekend” started with a bang as the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE! got underway. The Broncos beat the Colts in the first of many victories that would leave large portions of the fan base disappointed because it wasn’t dominant enough. The weekend also included what I still consider to be the greatest play in the history of the game:

Deadspin

This same week saw CSU lose to Boise State in a game that would greatly affect the remainder of their season regarding aspirations for a conference championship and a “New Year’s Bowl.”

The following week produced another Broncos’s win and, from the college world, this Vine, which has 23 million loops:

I love the pass defense here.

And this guy provided the best selfie-video of the year, from an LSU tailgate.

The Broncos lost to the Seahawks in their third week, which I said was “cool with me.” More importantly, that week provided us with a mascot wildcat intently listening to a postgame locker room speech. The speech is cool, but that mascot, on one knee, nodding in agreement is one of the funniest damn things from the entire year.

Colorado State Beats Boston College For A Huge, Wild Win” was one of the more fun write-ups I did this year. Here’s the lede:

Colorado State had no business beating Boston College as our Saturday mornings transitioned into Saturday afternoons. Not after CSU traveled farther east than the program had since 1959. Not after kicking off at 10:30 a.m. local time (an underrated factor in this game). Not after their senior quarterback threw two first-quarter interceptions. Not after falling behind 14-0 late in the second quarter. Not against an ACC team that beat the #9 team in the country on this field two weeks ago. Not with CSU’s senior quarterback beat up and grabbing his shoulder in pain after just about every play. Not when they were down three points facing a fourth-and-eleven with 1:05 left.

It also produced one of the better pictures of 2014.

Grayson to Lovett for the biggest play of Colorado State’s young season and a huge, dramatic win. (Stephan Savoia/AP

Indeed, the win over Boston College set the tone and made a statement in what would turn out to be a very special year for Colorado State.

On the last day of the MLB regular season, Jordan Zimmerman threw a no-hitter. Here’s the last play of the game from a unique vantage point.

OCTOBER:

October is always one of the best times of the year for sports. That was certainly the case this year with a great MLB Postseason, the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE!, college football, the NHL and the NBA all in full swing (eventually).

The first week saw the Kansas City Royals beat the Oakland Athletics in an incredible one-game playoff. They won it on this 12th-inning hit from Salvador Perez. This was probably the best game of 2014 in any sport.

The first Saturday in October saw four MLB postseason games and 11 of the top 19 college football teams lose. This might have been the best sports day of 2014.

Katy Perry was on ESPN College Gameday that morning, and after Ole Miss upset Alabama, she was out on the town celebrating:

One of those postseason games went 18 innings. It ended, at last, when Brandon Belt did this. (Notice the bat drop swag.)

By mid-October, the CSU Rams and the Denver Broncos were both rollin’. It seemed easy. Too f**kin’ easy. IT’S SO EASY! At least that’s what Julius Thomas thought.

And around this time, some huge news came off of a football field, when it was announced that Rockies co-GMs (or whatever they were) Dan O’Dowd and Bill Geivett both resigned. Jeff Bridich took over the role. My quick thoughts on the situation:

The Rockies organization is a mess. Change is good. At this point any front office change has to be considered a good thing. That said, the real problem is the guy who owns the team and he isn’t going anywhere. And because of Monfort’s stubborn loyalty towards O’Dowd, resigning is the only way O’Dowd was ever going to leave.

Naturally, Monfort immediately filled the position with an internal candidate. Very, very “Rockies” of him. Jeff Bridich seems like a bright young executive and for all we know, he could be the perfect replacement. But it would have been nice for Monfort to at least poke around the baseball world outside of his own organization.

So I think Rockies fans should proceed with some cautious optimism. I can’t get overly excited, but this is progress. And progress is good.

If you’ve been keeping up with these posts, you know how I feel about this truly amazing Vine.

Still laughing at that thing.

Not to be outdone, Lou Holtz had this to say in another Top-5 Vine.

After those nutty couple of weeks, we turned to watch CSU beat Utah State on homecoming weekend in front of their first sellout crowd in over a decade. The Rams were rollin’ at 6-1 and the games were a blast.

That same weekend Peyton Manning broke the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE! record for career passing touchdowns. (Man, there was a lot going on.) Of course Peyton and friends had to have some kind of silly (stupid) scripted celebration queued up.

@_MarcusD_

And the MLB Postseason marched on, too, with amazing game after amazing game. The Giants and Royals secured spots in the World Series. Here’s Joe Buck with my favorite play call of the year.

WE’RE STILL IN OCTOBER HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?! The Broncos moved to 6-1 with a convincing win over the Chargers. CSU moved to 7-1 with a dominating win over Wyoming to keep The Boot. And the Madison Bumgarner train charged into the World Series without slowing down. By the time he was done, he had put together one of the all-time great Postseason performances in MLB history and perhaps the best individual performance by any athlete in my lifetime.

The other great individual performance from the World Series came from CHEVY GUY, who became an instant sensation after producing all-time high levels of discomfort for everyone watching. “You know, technology and stuff.” (Also keep your eye on Bud Selig at the 33 second mark.)

The Nuggets and Avs also started their seasons in October. Those have both been, umm… disappointing. And boring. And uneventful.

NOVEMBER:

The first weekend of November saw the Broncos go into New England and get their asses kicked by the Patriots. This GIF is a pretty fitting description of how the day’s events went.

@cjzero

The loss to the Patriots forced the Broncos to reevaluate lots of things as their season moved along.

A week later a boring game against the Raiders produced yet another Top-5 Vine.

This guy was an easy selection for Douche of the Week:

So was this bird and the people delighted at his horrifying antics:

Mid-November is when the University of Florida fired their head coach, prompting some national speculation about who might replace Will Muschamp. Jim McElwain’s name was mentioned often. I wrote:

There are always a lot of moving parts in these situations and much of my outlook is based on speculation, but as of right now, there are plenty of reasons to be confident McElwain will be back with Colorado State next year.

Hmmm…

Odell Beckhamn Jr. made the best catch any of us have ever seen.

Deadspin

In the month’s final week, Colorado State went to Air Force for both teams’ final regular season game. The Rams were looking to finish an 11-1 season and still had hope for a Fiesta Bowl apearance. The Falcons capped off their own great regular season (9-3) when they beat the Rams with a field goal on the game’s last play. At the time, it was a devastating loss for Rams fans.

(Andy Cross, Denver Post)

The Broncos beat the Chiefs the next night and Travis Kelce did this.

And Tom Brady was taken for a walk by his handler:

CJ Zero/ Cauldren

DECEMBER:

The beginning of the year’s final month started with some big news when Jim McElwain did, indeed, accept the Florida head coaching position and leave the Rams behind. This was another of my better (and most read) posts of the year.

Those three strange days are over now, having put an odd stamp on the end of the Jim McElwain era at Colorado State. It was a short era that should be remembered fondly. It should be remembered as the three years that brought Colorado State out the dredges of 3-9 seasons and into respectability.

The Rams are no longer an embarrassment. The Rams are a force in the Mountain West. The Rams are back on the college football map.

Jim McElwain put them there.

The McElwain news was quickly followed by bigger, more important news when the CSU Board of Governors approved the much talked about new, on-campus stadium. Somebody, somewhere thinks it will look like this, sooooo… that’s pretty sweet.

It’s slated to open for the 2017 season if all goes well.

The end of the year wasn’t that long ago so you should really remember this stuff.

Colorado State played in the Las Vegas Bowl without a head coach and was blown out 45-10 by a good Utah team. Shortly thereafter, CSU announced the hiring of Georgia Offensive Coordinator Mike Bobo, which appears– albeit before a single game– to be a very solid hire.

I thnk that’ll do it, folks. 2014 was a fun one around these parts. I really do appreciate the hundreds of thousands of devoted readers who check in here each week. Here’s to a successful 2015 with more of the same fun posts on Tuesday afternoons.

And again, if you missed it, here’s Part One from last week.

And finally, here’s the funniest year-end video I’ve seen to date. You should recognize some of these clips, as I’ve happily touched on a bunch of the stuff in here over the past 12 months (and in the past two posts. Careful, you might hear some bad words.

Happy Tuesday, everybody. Thanks for reading. See ya next week.

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